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Sorry Not Sorry
Managing your insecurity and imposter syndrome
Sometimes I say sorry to express genuine regret:
“I’m sorry I didn’t respond to your text sooner. I was caught up in a challenging meeting and it was difficult to get away.”
In this day and age, expressing remorse for a thoughtless act or for inconveniencing someone is the least we can do for each other. Such expressions are the bare minimum empathetic response, but they’re not the only ones.
Sometimes I say sorry to express sympathy:
“That person was being so insensitive. I’m sorry you had to deal with that situation.”
The sympathy is well-intentioned, but executed clumsily: I always feel like saying “I’m sorry” for someone else’s pain takes the focus away from them and puts it on me. Maybe I’m overthinking it. But there’s another kind of sorry that is even more concerning.
Sometimes I say sorry as a smokescreen:
“I’m sorry, I’m terrible at sketching.”
“I’m sorry these wireframes aren’t accurate. I’m still learning the domain.”
“I’m sorry I’m rushing through these last few slides. I’m running out of time.”
“I’m sorry. I’m just noticing some mistakes in these mock-ups.”
